gosh dang it

you know what, i think i'm schizo. and have OCD-personality. perhaps i'm saying all this because i just took my psychiatry final exam, but i'm also up at 3am in the morning reading up on a bunch of old friends xanga blog sites instead of studying for my last three exams. the reason i self-diagnose is that i realize i can sorta be like two people at once, depending on the group i hang out with. ever since i kinda stopped hanging out with SJSU/badminton ppl, i'm so much more mature. reading up on their site made me miss all the crazy fun we had, but also realize that i'm older than them and in a diff stage of life. i dunno..some are only like 2 years younger, while others are still in college! but yea, i did talk more ghetto with them, did crazy things, led a "fun, exciting life" (according to some), and now i'm just as boring as can be. i mean, just take a look at my site! black and white...that's how boring simple and plain it's been these last few months.

now don't get me wrong--i absolutely LOVE what i'm learning here, and i'm having fun in a odd, intellectual way. but boy, do i miss playing badm from 11pm to 4am, winning drink/dinner game bets, seeing 10-15 friends every nite at open gym, eating a carrows after, driving 8h to SD or LA for tournaments, etc. it was so nice back then--so stress free, even tho i was in a MA program too.

now if you are truly curious, you can msg me and i'll give you my old xanga blog site which is MUCH more entertaining and gives you another side of me....if you dare...heheh. okies, it's 312am, i failed my psych exam this morn (as did rest of class, so i'm not too worried), did pretty well on my physical exam lab practical final (if any of you ever want to be given a COMPLETE physical exam from head to toe minus the rectal, pelvic and breast exam, i can do it in 45 min flat), and came back at 5pm to nap 2 hours away followed by 1h TV, 1.5h workout (felt great), and 3h xanga reading. sigh...so unmotivated to study! it's CRUEL i tell you, putting EIGHT finals in 3 weeks....don't even finish til 12/22, when rest of world (well, besides working world i guess) gets to relax. oh well, in due time, in due time...